My Weekend Was Better than A Gopher's. Maybe.

Dear Diary,

I am back. Did you miss me?

I see that Phoebe wrote in the diary. Oh dear. I cannot understand how the woman let Phoebe anywhere near a computer, let alone the Internet. Does she not know that girl is a power shopper? I expect the cute and rather tall UPS man (who brings us cookies) to show up any day now with loads of new toys, treats, and probably not a bit of couture.

And I bet P used up the credit card. I bet the credit card either exploded or disintegrated from so much use. Someone's going to be in the dog house...

The weekend was boring for a little while until the humans came home and gave us treats and chauffeured us about in the auto. The best part is when we go to the grocery. We get some treats, a little drink and some books to read and blankets in case we want to nap while they schlep around the store. I love grocery shopping.

In this chilly weather our car is nice and toasty and since it has big windows we get to scare anyone who parks near us. Hehehe. Here's the trick. They park their car and it usually is an old human because apparently Mom and The Geek shop at old people stores. Anyway, the old human will get out of his or her car and Phoebe will pop up on the window and lick them through the glass. Hahahah. You should see their faces. Either they run for their lives, clutch their heart, or jump about 2 feet into the air. Some of them must know about dogs because they laugh at her and stick a hand on the window so Phoebe can smell them through the glass. Phoebe wiggles like any good dog without a tail and jumps up and down licking the window in glee.

Me? I just continue reading War and Peace. That impresses them some. However, no one ever thinks to bang on my window. Good thing or I would show them what peevish looks like and it isn't pretty.

What a surprise last night. Since they roasted up a chicken and were lazy beyond belief, we got chicken and potatoes for dinner. Can you imagine? No green vegetables or fruit for dessert. And they didn't share the Cherry Garcia with us. How rude was that?

Apparently the woman is baking up stuff in the kitchen this morning and making a huge mess which always makes me nervous. I am so afraid I might fall asleep and miss the avalanche of stuff falling (because she piles it mile high) on the floor from which I could taste-test. And figures. Guess who is sleeping about 3 inches from her feet? And it isn't The Geek.

Gotta go now, dear diary. But I promise to get back here before Phoebe!

Kisses,

Lulu